Who Is Helping You Stay Healthy Enough to Lead?
Business owners spend a lot of time thinking about who can help the business grow.
Who can help with sales? Who can help with operations? Who can help with the books? Who can take work off my plate? Who can make the team stronger? Who can help us get to the next level?
Those are good questions.
But here's the question I think leaders need to ask more often: Who is helping you stay healthy enough to lead it?
Your business does not only need your ideas. It needs your clarity. It needs your presence. It needs your judgment. It needs your ability to make decisions from a grounded place instead of a worn-out one.
And if you are the person everyone looks to, your health impacts not only you, but the health of the business.
The business may be growing while you are running low
I see this with business owners all the time. The business is moving. The team is busy. The clients are being served. The calendar is full. From the outside, things look successful.
But the leader is tired.
They are making decisions all day every day. They are solving problems, answering questions, holding the emotional weight of the team, thinking about cash, thinking about clients, thinking about growth, and trying to go home and be present with the people they love.
That is way too much for one person.
Most leaders don't wake up one morning and suddenly realize they are empty. It usually happens slowly over time. Like when they skip working out or stop calling the friend who tells them the truth. They stop getting enough sleep and keep telling themselves they will deal with it when things slow down.
But you know it and I know it. Things do not always slow down.
And if the leader keeps giving from a place that is already thin, the business will eventually feel it too.
You need people around you, not just under you
A lot of business owners have people under them. They have employees, vendors, contractors, assistants, managers, or team members.
That is not the same as having people around them.
People under you help move the work.
People around you help you stay healthy enough to lead the work.
Those are different kinds of support.
You need people who:
Help you think clearly about money.
Ask better questions when you are too close to the decision.
Tell you when your pace is starting to cost you.
Care about your health, your marriage, your family, your faith, and the kind of life you are building around the business.
That may include a combination of a coach, a financial advisor, a counselor, a doctor, a spiritual mentor, a trusted peer, a close friend, or someone who has permission to say, “You are not okay, and you need to pay attention.” There’s no silver bullet. For me, it has been a combination of a few of these.
Business owners are often surrounded by people who need something from them.
It’s not enough to simply have people around you. You have to be intentional about the kind of support you build. Think of it like scaffolding around a building under renovation—it holds things steady, strengthens what’s being rebuilt, and helps you stand fully on your own.
And it is important to recognize that the people who report to you are not always the right people to carry that role. It is not their job to be your sounding board, your emotional support, or the ones who help you process the weight of leadership. You need other voices—peers, mentors, coaches, and trusted outside relationships—who can help you think clearly, stay grounded, and carry the weight of leadership with you instead of only taking from you.
The right support changes how you lead
One of the things I love seeing in long-term coaching work is the fruit that comes after years of staying with it.
At first, it’s usually not dramatic. Sometimes it looks like a leader having the same hard conversation more than once. Or it looks like a business owner learning how to stop making every decision alone. Sometimes it looks like someone finally building the support they should have had years ago.
I have watched leaders stay with the work long enough to see real change in their business and in themselves.
One business owner I had been working for a long time toward a major business decision inside a family business. That kind of work is not quick. There are family dynamics, trust, money, timing, vision, and years of history wrapped into the decision. But after hours and hours of doing the work, the door finally opened.
That is fruit.
I have also watched a business owner realize that the next level of growth could not only be about the company. He had to look at his own health too. He needed the right people around him so he could stay well enough to keep leading.
That is leadership too.
Because sometimes the issue is not that you need to push harder.
Sometimes you need better support.
Who gets to tell you the truth?
This is one of the most important questions a leader can ask.
Who gets to tell you the truth?
Not everyone should have that kind of access. But someone should.
I worked with a leader who had a team member who did not respect him. So when that team member gave feedback, it was coming from a mindset of someone who neither respected nor liked the leader. The question becomes: is that feedback something the leader needs to take to heart, or is it coming from a broken place?
And then the opposite happened. The same leader received feedback from a team member who essentially worshipped the ground he walked on. That too was coming from a broken place. Neither voice could be fully trusted for leadership growth.
So what is?
You need people who can tell you when you are moving too fast, avoiding a decision, overworking, making choices from fear, or calling exhaustion “responsibility.”
You need someone who can help you see patterns you are too close to notice.
You need someone who will not be impressed by your ability to keep pushing if the pushing is costing you too much.
That kind of support is not always comfortable, but it is good.
If everyone around you is depending on you, and no one is helping you pay attention to what is happening in you, the business may keep moving while you slowly disappear under the weight of leading it.
That is not the kind of business most people meant to build—or the kind of business people want to work for.
Start with the support you already need
You do not need to build a perfect support system overnight. Start by looking at the places where you already know you need help.
Ask yourself:
Who helps me think clearly about the business?
Who helps me think clearly about money?
Who helps me stay physically healthy?
Who helps me pay attention to my stress, anxiety, or burnout?
Who helps me stay grounded in my faith and values?
Who tells me the truth when I am moving too fast or taking on too much?
Who knows enough about my real life to ask better questions?
And remember, make sure you are not trying to get this kind of support from the people who report into you. Your team is there to help carry out the work of the business, not to carry the weight of your leadership health.
If you do not like your answers, that is worth noticing.
A leader without support will often start using the business as the place where everything gets processed. The team feels it. The family feels it. The clients may feel it too.
You were not made to lead with no one around you.
Your health is not separate from your leadership
A lot of business owners treat their health like something they will get back to later.
Later, when the team is stronger.
Later, when revenue is steadier.
Later, when the kids are older.
Later, when the next hire is made.
Later, when the season calms down.
But the way you are living now is affecting the way you are leading now.
If your body is worn down, your patience will be shorter. If your mind is overloaded, your decisions will feel harder. If your relationships are getting what is left of you, you will feel that ache even when the business is doing well.
Your business may need a better plan. Your team may need clearer roles. Your calendar may need stronger boundaries.
And you may need people who help you stay healthy enough to do the work in front of you.
That is not weakness.
That is wisdom.
The next right question
If you are looking at your business and wondering what needs to change next, do not only ask who can help the business grow.
Ask who is helping you stay healthy enough to lead it.
Who is helping you think clearly?
Who is helping you stay grounded?
Who is helping you tell the truth before you hit empty?
Who is helping you become the kind of leader this next season requires?
Those questions matter because you are not a machine. You are a person. And the business you are building will be shaped by the health, clarity, and support of the person leading it.
If you are realizing you have been trying to lead with too little support around you, I would be glad to sit with you in that. Schedule a Clarity Call, and we can talk through what you need in this season so you can lead from a healthier place.
